The burgers hit the table, the reporter is throwing out hooks, the owner is tapping into what’s happening and is giving some back story. Special sauce is flying everywhere and all the images now are flying into my eyeballs as tracers of teeth, meat and that foamy tip on the microphone. There is blood in the water and I am down with this frenzy.

Bun 24/30
Hearty, with a nice feel on the hand, the outside of this beauty is dusted with flour. Stable against the fatty patty it contains this while keeping all things in place from bite one to the last rounds of mastication. Mind you, I have been blessed with nimble dexterity in my mitts that can help even the most meek of buns to success. I don’t believe my partners faired as well with theirs. I appreciate the texture that this bun brought to the experience. I didn’t ask, but I’m assuming it’s an on site offering or at the very least delivered from a bakery that cares using a custom recipie. This bun doesn’t need an overhaul, but a tweak or two could make it a bun of wonder.

Meat 27/30
Cooked to order this ground sirloin is given every opportunity to rule, and rule it does. I did however order mine medium and it came out well done. I did not give that to much thought for two reasons:

One, I’m not used to a medium option when eating burgers in Alberta

Two, the meat has so much AAA flavour that I was hard pressed to remember my complaint after a few bites. Charbroiling this grind seems barbaric, but if you are not going to evolve to using a flat grill Buchanan’s can show you a thing or two about cooking meat the other way.

Toppings 25/30
I chose the bacon cheddar option. I found that since the cheese was melted on the patty that it lost a bit of the sharp edge that I always prefer. The bacon was there, but was not strong enough to break through the strong sirloin flavor. Leaf lettuce was the perfect choice for this ride and so too was the sharpness of red onion slices. The pickle is assertive and when asked to show up to the party it had no problem injecting some sour counter play. A well spiced secret sauce is both a nice nod to burger tradition and a tasty zinger that helps distinguish this as a unique burger experience.

Other considerations
Buchanans lives in that 70′s steakhouse tradition. They are aware of the slick metrosexual bromance haunts flooding the red meat scene, but they are in no rush to abandon their history for a slice of the over priced scenester pie. Buchanan’s can get pricey, but not without reason. The wall of scotch is far from the flask of Ballantines your uncle brings to every family wedding. At Buchanan’s, you can keep it simple and stay in your wallet, or you can dine and drink some specialties into a pretty exclusive bill. The cool thing is that you can do this in an environment that staves off pretense and begs you to lighten up for a second and enjoy something from the next shelf up.

Final Evaluation: What would you do to have one of these again?
Against the owner’s better judgement, I would drink myself across one shelf of their whiskey to eat another one of these gems.

Dad: Come on, we are going for lunch at Buchanan’s
Me: Where’s that?
Dad: Doesn’t matter. You’ll like it.

Few people know you as well as your parents; it’s why they drive you crazy. My Dad was right in this case, it didn’t matter where this place was, he knew that I would like it. I remember walking into Buchanan’s in a weird slo-motion kind of way, like that scene in Pulp Fiction when Vincent walks into JackRabbit Slims. We walked through the doors, were greeted by the polite host, and were led to the table where our friend was sitting. I am not sure, but I think the host gave me a knowing wink that said “you are in for a treat, kid.” During the walk, I noticed something – this is a place where men go – not boys. I saw businessmen having power lunches, lone wolves making conversation with the bartender at the bar about sports, and pals catching up all while enjoying steaks, burgers and booze.

We sat with our friend in the wooden both with the vintage movie posters and that’s when it happened: The server delivered the Buchanan’s burger. Eyes bulging out of my head, mouth agape, I watched as this beast was placed in front of us. I had never seen a burger like that in my entire life. It was glowing. My obvious shock was met with a phrase that has now come to define the quest.

Dad’s Friend (spoken at regular speed – remembered in slo-motion with him inadvertently spitting on the table): “This is the best burger in town.”

I clearly remember thinking at that time, “whoa, it looks pretty good, but that’s a bold statement. Is it the best burger in town?” Well, many years later things have come full circle as I entered Buchanan’s, fully able to appreciate the fineness of this establishment as a place for men to go, hang out and enjoy a meal. But 13 year old me and 31 year old me still have the same question, “is this the best burger in town?” Well,let’s get down to it.

Bun 23/30
The bun is a quality piece of bread. It has great flavour and texture and I assume that it is delivered fresh daily. The problem with this bun is that it has a dusting of flour on the outside, which is something that you probably would never think of as a factor in the hamburger experience, but it turns out that it is as the flour really dries out your mouth as you are eating the burger. Normally, dryness is combatted by the juiciness of the burger and toppings, but the bun is a bit too wide for burger, so the bites around the edges are pure bread. No flour and a smaller bun and you have an absolute winner.

Meat 29/30
This is ground AAA sirloin that is cooked how you like it by journeymen chefs. The flavour of the meat is incredible and it maintains its juiciness start to finish. The char on the outside is perfect and you can tell that serious thought has been put into the preparation of this patty. This patty would score perfect marks for me if not for one thing: the patty is almost a baseball of meat. I know a lot of people who like that, and when you are using quality meat that is prepared by pros, it works. But for personal taste, I prefer a patty that is more uniform in its distribution, which would help alleviate some of the bun troubles mentioned above. It’s easily the highest quality meat that we have had on the quest so far and really, baseball or not, it’s a star.

Toppings 25/30
Fresh toppings were all high quality and Buchanan’s serves your burger with a homemade special sauce that is made of magical spices. Everything on its own is great, but the toppings have a tough time getting their moment in the spotlight since the meat really dominates the flavour experience. This was most evident in the cheese department. Way more cheese is needed to give the ever important cheese tang flavour you want to find in every bite. Cheese and meat is a spectacular combination. So is cheese and jam, cheese and apple, cheese and pie, cheese and crackers, cheese and maple syrup…you get the point.

More cheese, please!

Other considerations
If I could eat at a place like this every day I would. I would also be an enormous blob, but let’s not think about that. Let’s focus on what life would be like if I could eat at Buchanans’ every day without consequence, a la Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.

I am greeted by the owner, Carol, who is super friendly and has a true passion for her business. I would then be seated at a table that would allow me to admire the whiskey bar and maybe steel a quick glance of the score in the game from the unobtrusive TV above the bar. Fresh biscuits would follow and I place a drink order with my server who is a total pro. Once my drink comes, I take a few minutes to enjoy it while taking in the smells and sounds. You know, just have a nice sit for a few moments. Then, I order a steak, fish, burger, soup, or whatever and eat delicious food that is well prepared until I couldn’t eat anymore. I chase it all with a beautiful whiskey, pay my bill, say goodbye, and walk home.

Final Evaluation: What would you do to have one of these again?
“I am living at the Villa Borghese. There is not a crumb of dirt anywhere, nor a chair misplaced. We are all alone here and we are dead.” This is a line from the Tropic of Cancer. I would read the whole thing to go back to Buchanan’s.

With a massive (200+) whiskey list, it is the ideal place to turn a 1 hour lunch into a 2 hour lunch into a “why the hell would we go back to work” lunch.

There’s good reason why this has been the go to place for big-time business lunches in Calgary for years…everything is pro. The servers are experienced and on their game, understanding the need to be attentive, but not over-bearing. Similarly, the food is prepared with such a deft touch that it is clear that the folks in the kitchen have chosen food as a career, not as a part-time job.

We did note a sign at the entrance that read ““No cigars, No handguns, No nuclear weapons, No food critics.”, but idle threats aren’t enough to deter the quest.

Bun 23/30
I don’t want to talk about the bun. Let’s get on to the star of this show…the meat!

Meat 29/30
My heart skipped a beat when I read this glorious phrase in Buchanan’s menu:

“Burgers are Cooked from Rare to Well Done and everything in between. Please tell us how you like it.”

Hallelujah! This is the first time on BQ that we have been able to order our burgers cooked to the way we want it. How can they do this? Simple….they are using ground Alberta Grade AAA 100% sirloin, so there isn’t the usual concern over the dreaded “burger disease” that causes everyone else to cook the holy hell out of their beef.

This alone instantly separates Buchanan’s from the pack. I ordered mine medium and it was cooked to perfection. The meat itself is clearly high-end with terrific flavor and texture, which goes a long way to justify the rather steep $18 price tag.

This is a big-boy burger for big-boy lovers of beef.

Toppings 22/30
Some disappointment in this area. I’ve noticed that when a burger joint places a great deal of focus on the meat itself, they seem to treat the toppings as an after-thought. With an inch-thick patty, the burger needed some sweetness to provide a full flavor experience. Typical condiments (mustard, ketchup) weren’t included in favor of Buchanan’s “Secret Burger Sauce.” However, I found this sauce to be a better accompaniment for the fries and not so much the burger itself.

The veg was clearly fresh, but regrettably the pickle I had was the dreaded “stumpy end” dill that should have been tossed in the bin. Certain parts of the pickle are better than others, and if I’m paying 18 bills for a burger I think I deserve the best portions of every ingredient.

Some slightly more attention to the toppings would get this burger into the 90s.

Other considerations
Enjoying great food is an experience that involves all the senses, including sight. In that vein, perhaps my favourite moment in this quest was my first look at my burger. This was a meal that was plated with a great deal of care instead of just thrown together. I was in love with this burger before it even reached my mouth…it looked that damn good.

The basket of home-made complimentary biscuits are a nice-touch. It is the little things like this that bring people back to a restaurant and turn them into regulars.

Buchanan’s gets absolutely crushed during the lunch hours, so either make your trek down there after 2 PM or call ahead for a reservation. The lunch rush can also impact the food to a degree as my fries were slightly undercooked.

Final Evaluation: What would you do to have one of these again?
I never make reservations. So as such, to ensure my spot at Buchanan’s at lunch, I would poke my head in the door and proclaim “Obama just approved the Keystone” and patiently wait to get the pick of any table as oil execs flood the exits.